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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26688217">this godforsaken mess</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ALovelyLitwit/pseuds/ALovelyLitwit'>ALovelyLitwit</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>A Happy Ending, Alcohol, Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, casual homophobia and biphobia, emotional cheating let's be honest, heterosexuals being dumb, maybe the slightest allusion to a soulmate bond?</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 10:33:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,794</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26688217</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ALovelyLitwit/pseuds/ALovelyLitwit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Forrest is out of town and Alex needs a date to a dinner party. Michael is the only person available.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Forrest Long/Alex Manes, Michael Guerin/Alex Manes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>53</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>194</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><i>I don’t love you anymore, I don’t love you anymore, I don’t love you anymore</i>. Alex recites the words in his head over and over again, hoping that at some point in the very near future he’ll believe them. But the clock is ticking and the sound of an old Chevy engine is growing louder by the second.</p>
<p>Michael pulls into Alex’s driveway and shuts his engine off. Alex stands in front of him, haloed by his headlights. They stare at each other through the windshield for far too long before Michael opens his door and slides out of the truck. It’s been one week since they last saw each other. And nearly eight since they’ve properly spoken.</p>
<p>Alex stuffs his hands in his pockets. ‘Thanks for doing this on such short notice.’ He doesn’t wait for a response, just turns his back to Michael and walks to his Explorer. It was supposed to be Forrest with him tonight, but he’d been called away to New York on book business. Finding a replacement date at 5:30 pm on a Friday afternoon proved impossible, until he’d done the unthinkable and called Michael.</p>
<p>He’d wanted to cancel - had dialed his CO’s number multiple times without pressing send. Alex had turned her down so many times before that canceling last minute seemed rude and childish and possibly ruinous to his career. But showing up dateless to a dinner party with several other couples seemed ruinous to his mental health, so he’d called everyone in his contacts list.</p>
<p>This whole night promises to end in disaster. He looks up as Michael walks towards the passenger side of his SUV and notices for the first time what he’s wearing. Or more accurately, what he’s not wearing. There’s no audacious belt buckle, no cowboy hat, no grease anywhere he can see. His jeans are new - dark wash denim and so perfectly snug that Alex wonders if they’ve been tailored. And instead of his usual button-up, Michael’s in a v-neck sweater - black cashmere from the looks of it. How Isobel got him to wear any of this is beyond Alex’s comprehension. ‘You look good.’</p>
<p>Michael shuts the door and stares at him. ‘Isobel forced me into Max’s clothes. The sweater’s itchy and the jeans are too long.’ He glances down to where the ends of his pants are cuffed. Same old worn boots on his feet. </p>
<p>That tiny piece of Michael makes Alex smile. ‘But not the boots, huh?’</p>
<p>‘Over my dead body.’ Michael risks smiling back. ‘You look good, too. But you always look good.’</p>
<p>Alex has to force himself to drag his eyes away, distracting himself with turning his key in the ignition. ‘Again, Michael. Thank you so much.’ The engine roars to life. ‘It’s more than I had any right to ask.’</p>
<p>‘No more apologies. Just fill me in on what I need to know to survive the night. She’s your boss, right?’ He pulls down the sun visor, messing with his hair while avoiding catching his own eye in the mirror. </p>
<p>‘Commanding Officer, yes. Major Denise Williams. Her husband’s name is Dan. There will be several other couples there - none of them military. All of them heterosexual. Everyone knows I’m gay and in a relationship. You’re a friend helping out last minute.’ Alex hopes none of the small talk ventures too close to their past. But the fear pooling in his stomach knows they’re going to be asked several uncomfortable questions. </p>
<p>‘Are we ex-lovers or do we avoid that entirely?’ Michael flips the sun visor shut and turns his gaze out the window. ‘To be honest, Alex. I’m not in the mood to lie.’</p>
<p>‘No lying. I loved you and you loved me. It didn’t work. We’re trying to be friends.’ The air in the SUV thickens. Michael shifts in the leather seat, crossing his ankles. ‘Hopefully, that will make the conversation awkward enough to shut everyone up.’</p>
<p>Michael nods and returns his focus outside. The rest of the drive is silent. Not even the radio filling the spaces between them.</p>
<p>The Major’s house is modest in size but well-tended. The yard mostly rock except for the occasional plot of prettily landscaped desert flowers and shrubbery. One large pinyon pine anchoring the space and providing a fair amount of late afternoon shade. Alex parks on the street behind a Subaru and cuts the engine. ‘You ready?’</p>
<p>‘I hope that’s a rhetorical question.’ Michael opens his door and slides out. Waits for Alex to walk around and join him. ‘You and I both know we aren’t ready for this.’ They share a meaningful look and step together towards the front door.</p>
<p>Alex raises a finger to press the doorbell, but the door swings open before he gets the chance. ‘Captain Manes, so good to see you again.’ Dan Williams extends his hand which Alex shakes. </p>
<p>‘You too, Dan. This is my friend, Michael Guerin.’ He motions to Michael who also extends his hand.</p>
<p>‘Nice to meet you, Michael. Come inside, you two. Denise is in the kitchen with our other guests.’ They cross the threshold and follow Dan into the kitchen, taking in their surroundings as they go. Michael making sure to note any exits in case a quick getaway is needed. Alex smirks at him, knowing exactly what he’s up to.</p>
<p>‘No crawling out of any windows, please,’ he mutters under his breath. </p>
<p>Michael smirks back at him. ‘No promises.’</p>
<p>‘Alex!’ A middle-aged blond woman greets them, lipsticked grin spread wide across her face and not at all what Michael had expected. She’s happily plump and her warmth radiates throughout the room. ‘And you must be Michael.’</p>
<p>‘Thank you for inviting us, Major. We got you a little something.’ He hands her a bottle of wine. ‘Dan texted me your favorite brand.’ </p>
<p>She takes the bottle of Cabernet and pulls him into a hug. ‘No Major or Captain tonight. Just Denise and Alex. And thank you for the wine. I can be quite the lush when I’m off duty.’ She winks and Michael cannot believe this woman is in the Air Force. ‘Now come meet everyone.’</p>
<p>Denise introduces them to two other couples. Mark and Silvia who are close to Michael and Alex’s age. Bobby and Tally who are about ten years older. Everyone is pleasant and polite, spending most of the conversation focused on discussing the Williams’ bathroom rehab and their desire to put a pool in next summer. Michael gladly accepts a beer and Alex takes a glass of wine. They keep to the edges of the conversation, rarely offering more than a nod or a hum of agreement.</p>
<p>Somewhere along the way, they subconsciously press together - shoulder to hip. Oblivious until Tally smiles at them and asks the first devastating question of the night. ‘How long have you two been dating?’</p>
<p>Michael and Alex leap apart from each other like they’ve been burned. Alex cuts his eyes to Denise who steps in to save them. ‘I’m sorry, Alex. I forgot to inform everyone before you arrived.’ She turns to the group. ‘Alex’s boyfriend had to go out of town last minute. Michael is a good friend giving up his Friday evening to save Alex from facing us alone.’</p>
<p>Alex smiles his thanks and exchanges a look with Michael. ‘We used to date. In high school, mostly. Never worked out.’ It’s a version of the truth.</p>
<p>‘So, you’re both gay?’ Mark asks, innocently. Sipping at his own glass of wine.</p>
<p>‘I’m bisexual, actually.’ Michael answers, hiding his annoyance with a practiced ease.</p>
<p>The oven timer buzzes and Dan claps his hands. ‘Dinner’s ready. Everyone go grab a seat at the table.’ He shuffles everyone but Michael and Alex into the dining room. </p>
<p>Denise pulls the roast chicken from the oven and then takes them aside. ‘I’m so sorry. That whole conversation was my fault. I should have explained everything before you arrived. I guess I know why you’ve been avoiding this for so long, Alex.’</p>
<p>Alex does his best to fake a smile. ‘It’s okay, Major. I’ve handled worse.’ </p>
<p>Dan returns to grab the chicken. Denise moves to follow him out of the kitchen. ‘Take a breather. Join us when you’re ready.’ She pats both of them on the arm and disappears.</p>
<p>‘I’m so sorry. We can leave it you want. She’d never hold it against me.’ He mindlessly gathers a fistful of Michael’s shirt and starts to tug him towards the front door. ‘I can text her from outside.’</p>
<p>Michael grabs hold of his waist. ‘Hey, stop. I’m okay. We’re okay. Like you said, we’ve handled way worse. Casual homophobia with a side of biphobia tainted with a shitload of ignorance? Piece of cake.’</p>
<p>That earns him a small smile. ‘Casual bigotry always feels particularly heinous.’ </p>
<p>Neither is sure how they end up with their arms wrapped around each other, but regardless, that’s where they land. Hugged tightly together in a strange kitchen. The moment oddly intimate and entirely devoid of sex. They take a long moment to breathe one another in and relax. ‘I like Denise. I bet she’s a good boss. Not at all what I’d imagined.’ </p>
<p>Reluctantly, Alex pulls away. He has trouble meeting Michael’s eye, standing so close. ‘She is a good boss. It’s one of the reasons I didn’t want to mix the professional with the personal. But everyone in my unit has been to one of her dinners. I couldn’t keep saying no.’</p>
<p>‘And it was supposed to be Forrest with you. The incredibly charming boyfriend who never lets anything ruffle his feathers. And who can spend endless hours talking about his research in a way that makes everyone swoon.’ Michael rolls his eyes good-naturedly.  </p>
<p>‘Maybe you could regale them with your expertise on rebuilding engines. Or applied mathematics. Drug them all to sleep with your brilliance.’ Michael laughs loudly and from out of nowhere Alex wants to kiss him. Rarely has he ever wanted to kiss anyone so desperately. He white knuckles the counter behind him to keep himself from taking a step further, palms sweating and heart racing. <i>I don’t love you anymore, I don’t love you anymore, I don’t love you anymore</i>.</p>
<p>The chant hadn’t worked at the beginning of the night and it’s not working now.</p>
<p>Michael tilts his head towards the dining room. ‘Let’s go eat.’</p>
<p>Dinner goes well, the food is excellent. Alex and Michael get to fade into the background for a while as talk returns to home repair and upcoming travel plans. A little extra alcohol doesn’t hurt either. Alex notices they both drink enough to get a decent buzz going and to calm their nerves. Everyone at the table well ahead of them anyway. Alex is pretty positive the Air Force would frown upon his CO plying him with so much free booze, but he’s not planning on telling anyone so he takes another sip of wine.</p>
<p>Eventually, Silvia turns to Alex. ‘Denise tells us that you’re dating Forrest Long. I’ve seen him around town and know he’s helping his uncle out on the farm. How did you two meet?’</p>
<p>He can feel Michael bristle next to him. But there’s nothing he can do about that and his answer’s certainly not going to help either. ‘Through Michael, actually. They got to know each other at the local library, fighting over the microfiche reader.’</p>
<p>‘Oh, that’s so interesting. What were you researching at the library, Michael? If you don’t mind my asking, of course.’ Everyone turns their attention to Michael, and Alex mentally chastises himself. </p>
<p>‘Nothing special. Some family history and the 1947 UFO crash. Forrest was doing the same for his book.’ They all nod their heads and return to eating.</p>
<p>‘That’s sweet.’ Denise raises her glass to them. ‘Most exes can barely stand being in the same room together and here you two are playing matchmaker for each other. The only thing I ever wanted to do with one of my exes was fling them into the sun.’ She smiles across the table at her husband and everyone raises their glasses, laughing in agreement.</p>
<p>‘We’re not as well-adjusted as we sound. I’ve wanted to fling him into the sun more times than I can count. And I’m sure the same is true for him.’ Alex chuckles along with the group and glances at Michael. They smile fondly at each other and Michael takes another risk, placing his hand on Alex’s thigh underneath the table.</p>
<p>‘Yeah, but if I ever flung you into the sun, I’d just build a spaceship to go get you back.’ He squeezes Alex’s knee and his eyes soften.</p>
<p>‘Me, too.’ He plants his hand on top of Michael’s and the rest of the room fades away. It is the closest Alex has ever come to cheating on someone. </p>
<p>Dan clears his throat and they both jerk their heads in his direction. ‘Were you each other’s first loves?’</p>
<p>Michael starts talking before Alex manages to find suitable words. ‘Yes. We were two really soft kids with rough upbringings who found a home in each other. However briefly.’ The table falls silent until Mark begins the story of how he and his wife met working as lifeguards during college.</p>
<p>Dinner ends soon after. Dan and Denise making everyone a plate of food to take home and wishing everyone a goodnight. Denise waves to Michael, but pulls Alex aside. ‘He’s a sweet boy, Alex. I’m glad I got to meet him.’ She stares at him for a beat too long, eyebrows furrowed. ‘May I offer you some unsolicited advice? Please feel free to tell me to fuck off.’</p>
<p>Alex’s eyes widen at her swear. She laughs and shakes her head. ‘I never dreamed of being in the Air Force. And I sure as shit never intended to become a lifer. But life has a funny way of sending us down the right path - no matter how hard we fight against it.’ She gives him one last knowing look. ‘I’ll see you on Monday morning. Tell Michael I think he’s a delight.’</p>
<p>When Alex gets back to his Explorer, Michael is leaning against the driver’s side door. ‘Your keys.’ He’s holding out his hand.</p>
<p>‘I can drive.’ But even he has to admit the world is spinning slightly and his steps are more than little wobbly. Michael doesn’t pull his hand away. ‘Fine.’ He slaps his keys in Michael’s palm. ‘How come you’re so sober?’</p>
<p>‘Years of practice, baby. Plus, after the first beer, I strategically switched to water.’ He smirks and unlocks the car. Michael’s a constant marvel and Alex misses him so much.</p>
<p>The ride home is once again silent. Alex dozes off and wakes up to discover Michael leaning over his lap to unfasten his seat belt. ‘I miss you.’ He doesn’t mean to say it. But he’s glad it’s out in the open now. </p>
<p>Michael helps him slide out of his seat and plant his feet firmly on the ground. ‘That’s the wine talking. Just last week you avoided talking to me in the cereal aisle.’</p>
<p>‘I have to avoid you or something wrong will happen.’ Michael ignores him and walks him to his front door, using his telekinesis to click the deadbolt open. All Alex’s security lights turn on, flooding his patio with bright, blinding light. Returning some of his sense to him and flaming his cheeks with embarrassment. ‘I’m sorry. You’re right. I had too much wine.’</p>
<p>Michael nods, letting the whole thing go with a shrug. ‘You okay on your own?’</p>
<p>‘Yeah. Thanks again. For everything. I owe you.’ Alex wants to hug him. Wants to kiss him back in time to the moment right before he’d kissed Forrest that first time. But he doesn’t do either. ‘Goodnight, Michael.’</p>
<p>‘Night, Alex.’ He turns and strides to his truck. The darkness of night stealing him from Alex’s sight.</p>
<p>The Chevy disappears down the street, the chug of the engine growing fainter as the stars shine overhead. And Alex tries one last time. <i>I don’t love you anymore, I don’t love you anymore, I don’t love you anymore</i>.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Alex accidentally sends Michael a soul-destroying text.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This got a lot softer than I meant it to. But that's okay. It's what they deserve. There's also a Taylor Swift lyric paraphrase again!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alex goes inside and showers, letting the scalding water strip him clean. Afterwards, he sits on the edge of his bed and decides to be a coward. He taps on Forrest’s name and presses send. Thirty minutes later he’s single again.</p><p>The decision to end their relationship is the right call. The decision to end their relationship over the phone and physically separated by two thousand miles? Not so much. But Alex had felt so guilty all night long. Honestly, he’d felt guilty the entirety of their relationship. He comforts himself by remembering that Forrest was intending to leave Roswell soon anyway.</p><p>Staring down at his phone, the display goes black. It would be beyond wrong to call Michael not five minutes after breaking up with Forrest. So he lies down on his bed and climbs underneath the duvet, sinking into his pillow. His phone still held firmly in his hand. Unlocking the screen, he scrolls through his contacts until Michael’s name pops up. He opens a new text conversation.</p><p>Alex types a string of texts and deletes every single one. Over and over again. <i>I miss you, Come home, I broke up with Forrest, I’m lonely, You looked so good tonight, Do you still love me because I still love you</i>. </p><p>But in the end, the only one that gets accidentally sent is <i>I don’t love you anymore</i>.</p><p>Alex switches his lamp off completely unaware that across town his text is lighting up Michael’s phone and destroying his heart.</p><p>The next morning Alex ignores his phone until noon when he decides to ask Liz and Maria to lunch. He’s surprised to see Michael’s name at the top of his text conversations. He’s even more surprised to see the last text he’d sent. The <i>I don’t love you anymore</i> slapping him in the face and turning his blood cold. Without stopping to consider much of anything, he grabs his keys and rushes out the door, desperate to fix the mess he knows he’s created.</p><p>On the way to the junkyard, he tries to call Michael multiple times to no avail. None of his texts get answered either. At the airstream, the Chevy is nowhere in sight, but Alex knocks loudly on the door anyway. Shouting Michael’s name and getting no answer.</p><p>He tries calling again. He tries texting again. The lack of response is deeply troubling.</p><p>Climbing back into his Explorer, he drives to the Wild Pony. Maria opens early on weekends and sure enough, when he pulls into the dirt lot, Michael’s truck is the first thing he sees. Glancing down at his phone, Michael still hasn’t answered any of his messages. Alex sighs and tries to mentally prepare himself for what awaits him inside. Working through various scenarios and probable outcomes in his head, while simultaneously giving himself a pep talk.</p><p>He loves Michael. He loves Michael and he can fix this. With words. He’ll need his words.</p><p>He finds Michael hunched over the bar, halfway through his second beer. Maria gives him a pointed look and then tilts her head towards Michael. Alex nods and makes his way over, sitting on the stool next to his. ‘I’ve been trying to call you all morning.’</p><p>It takes a minute for Michael to respond, increasing Alex’s anxiety. But then, his face winces slightly. ‘Left my phone at home. Just didn’t want to think for a while. Or talk to anyone.’ He raises the glass of whiskey to his lips but doesn’t drink, eyes concentrated on the brown liquor swirling inside.</p><p>Alex reaches out to touch Michael. Somewhere on the arm, but he never makes it past a shaky hover. ‘I didn’t mean to send that text, Michael. I really didn’t.’</p><p>Michael nods, but doesn’t look at him. ‘Okay.’ He tips the glass against his lips and takes a short sip, tongue darting out to lick his lips afterward. He sets the tumbler down on the bar and grabs his hat, standing up to leave. ‘See you around, Alex.’</p><p>‘Wait.’ Alex reaches for his arm again and this time makes contact, wrapping his fingers firmly around Michael’s bicep. ‘Please stay. I have more to say.’</p><p>Michael shakes him off, frowning. ‘I think you’ve said enough. And honestly? I don’t know that I care.’ He puts his hat on his head and starts towards the door. Ignoring the way Maria cuts her eyes at him and then back at Alex.</p><p>‘I broke up with Forrest.’ He says it loudly enough that the handful of people in the bar stop to stare at him. He’ll maybe regret that later, but right now all Alex sees is Michael. The way he pauses and loosens his fists, the tension in his shoulders easing. ‘Last night when I got home.’</p><p>‘And what am I supposed to do with that information? I don’t love you anymore, Michael, but I broke up with my boyfriend. Is that supposed to make me feel better or worse?’ He shrugs his shoulders with a huff and turns back to Alex, doing his best to keep his emotions in check.</p><p>Alex finally feels all of the eyes on them and walks closer to Michael, lowering his voice. ‘Can we take this outside?’</p><p>Michael looks around the room, staring down each and every pair of eyes until they divert their gaze. ‘If I go outside, Alex, the only thing I intend to do is get into my truck and go home. So whatever you want to say, say it now.’</p><p>No one is watching them any longer. Not after Michael’s obvious threat. But Alex can’t help but check over his shoulder anyway. Old habits die hard and unfortunately, he knows he’ll never be entirely safe at the hands of the Pony’s clientele. ‘Charles Clarke is one of this town’s loudest bigots. Meet me outside.’ </p><p>He knows Alex is right. Knows all too well what Charles Clarke is capable of. It’s just that the Pony is like home to him - a space he feels comfortable in especially when facing what might end up being his worst nightmare. Maria meets his eye with a no-nonsense look and nods her chin towards the door mouthing go. He sighs and follows Alex outside. </p><p>Alex is leaning against the driver’s side door of Michael’s truck. Arms crossed and shoulders squared. Michael understands that Alex has made up his mind about something and will stand there until he is heard. He’s a stubborn fuck when he wants to be and right now Alex really, really wants to be. Michael takes a deep breath and goes to him.</p><p>It’s Alex’s turn to fight the emotion in his voice. ‘I didn’t mean to send the text. But more than that, I didn’t <i>mean</i> the text.’ He watches Michael roll his eyes and takes a step closer, the gap between them less than two feet. ‘I spent all day yesterday chanting that to myself. Trying to convince myself it was true. To survive dinner. To survive being next to you all night. To survive being in love with you when I shouldn’t be.’ Alex throws his hands into the air. ‘It didn’t work. So I broke up with Forrest and wanted to text you to come back. But that felt wrong. So I kept chanting.’</p><p>It’s what Michael has wanted to hear for years.</p><p>He doesn’t know what to say. But Alex is waiting so he searches for the right words without having any idea what they might sound like. His mind races through the million possibilities, but he takes too long and his body takes over. Hands suddenly on Alex’s waist, pressing him back into the Chevy. More words flow through his head - the normal metaphors, the straightforward declarations of love, the logical concerns about their volatile history - but while the words try to work themselves out, his hands slide up and over Alex’s ribcage to rest on his chest where Alex’s heartbeat knocks hard underneath his palms.</p><p>Their lips are close. Too close. Alex grabs at Michael’s shoulders to hold him in place. ‘Last night my CO said that life has a funny way of sending us down the right path no matter how hard we fight against it. I want you to kiss me so bad right now, but not if we don’t both believe that this is the right path - the only path. Because the next time you kiss me, Michael, I don’t intend to let you stop. Please be sure.’</p><p>Neither of them cares about keeping their emotions at bay anymore. Both their eyes glistening at the corners. Michael had been so broken-hearted that morning and Alex so terrified. And now all of that is just gone. Washed away with a few words and the magic of them.</p><p>Michael stares at the dimple in Alex’s chin, eyes darting up to his bottom lip more than once. He drums his fingertips along Alex’s collarbones and finally raises his head enough to meet his gaze. ‘I like when you use your words.’ He smiles in that soft way no one can resist but that shines brightest for Alex. ‘And I agree with your boss. Because I fought hard as hell and yet here I am. Right back where I belong.’ </p><p>He brings his hands up to Alex’s neck, but neither immediately moves any closer. For once, time finally feels like it’s on their side and not some ticking timebomb waiting to blow up in their chests. Alex slides his hands up Michael’s forearms, stopping at his wrists. They hold each other steady and let their lips curl into identical smiles. ‘I love you.’ It’s said at the same time and punctuated with laughter. The unfamiliar sound transports them back to seventeen before everything had unraveled at the seams. A reset in the way their eyes light up and a chance to start again in the blush that colors their cheeks.</p><p>Gravity or something cosmic pushes them forward, their lips meeting tentatively in the middle. Toes curling and two sharp exhales bring relief before mouths press harder together in that perfect dance they perform so well. Tongues touching and tasting, sending shivers down their spines. Hips pulled into hips, settling into each other like so many times before. The one difference being the certainty that this won’t be the last time, that tomorrow and the day after tomorrow they’ll meet again. Michael and Alex’s love no longer a hoax they’d wanted to believe in, but the truth they can no longer deny.</p><p>Before they get so lost there’s no turning back, Alex breaks their kiss and rests his forehead on Michael’s. ‘I haven’t said I’m sorry yet.’</p><p>‘Me either. But maybe we don’t have to. Maybe waking up next to each other every morning can be apology enough.’ Michael straightens Alex’s shirt over his chest and quirks his lips into a bashful smile.</p><p>‘Every morning?’</p><p>He nods. ‘Once I crawl in, I’m not crawling back out. You said to be sure.’</p><p>It’s a lot - the idea of forever. And it’s burned them before. </p><p>‘So we’re really doing this?’ Alex snakes his arms around Michael’s neck, threading his fingers through the curls at the nape of his neck. ‘Out in the open - you and me?’</p><p>Their identical grins return. ‘Let’s annoy the fuck out of everyone. Just never stop touching ever again. I can already hear Valenti complaining.’</p><p>Alex laughs. ‘Isobel will want to watch. She’s a wild one, your sister.’</p><p>‘Just very sex positive.’ The door to the Pony crashes open and they jump apart, but it’s only Maria taking out the trash.</p><p>She shields her eyes from the midday sun and looks towards them. ‘Would you mind convincing your boyfriend to pay his bartab? Never worked for me before but I suspect you may have more influence, Alex.’ She smiles, genuinely happy for them. They wave at her as she rounds the corner, disappearing from sight.</p><p>‘Come home with me.’ Alex motions to his Explorer, grabs Michael’s hand and tugs him towards the SUV. They climb inside and Maria watches them vanish down the highway. The scene playing out exactly as she’d seen in her head. Her visions or prophecies are very rarely ever this straightforward. But then again, Michael and Alex have a special way of defying expectations, turning the upside down  downside up. The idea that even the mysteries of the universe bow to the invisible threads that bind them together really shouldn’t be so surprising. </p><p>Clutching her chest where her necklace no longer sits, she heads back inside in awe of the future she knows is waiting for them.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading! Cross-posted to @liwitlady on Tumblr.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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